Russian joke of the week

Husband wakes up after heavy drinking


Муж просыпа́ется по́сле жесто́кой пья́нки. Смо́трит – бельё пости́рано и погла́жено, на сту́льчик пове́шено, на столе́ за́втрак и буты́лка пи́ва. Жена́ ушла́ на рабо́ту не сказа́в ни сло́ва, без исте́рики.
Он к сы́ну:
— Сын, что вчера́ бы́ло?
— Па́па, ты пришёл в два часа́ но́чи пья́ный в хлам и упа́л на крова́ть. А когда́ ма́ма попыта́лась тебя́ разде́ть ты сказа́л: не тронь, зара́за, я жена́т!


Husband wakes up after heavy drinking. Looks around: his cloth is washed, ironed, and hung on a chair, on the table there is a breakfast and a bottle of beer. His wife went to work without saying a word, without a scandal.
He asks his son:
- Son, what happened yesterday?
- Dad, you came home at two o'clock in the morning totally drunk and fell on the bed. And when mom tried to undress you, you said: don't touch me bitch, I'm married!
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